Swizzle sticks loom distorted
by the angle of vision
skyscrapers askew
in the city of drunkeness.
A glass, a clear glass
of only water--
no one will bring it to me.
A man could die of a hangover
trying to remember
where he put his keys
not to mention his car.
The walls are stained and sweating.
It's like being underwater,
fish in a grimy tank
in some dentist's office.
One clean glass, one fisheye lens
of unwelcome clarity
shows me last night's
dusty bottle.
--image courtesy of Magpie Tales
Collection available! Knocking from Inside
Wednesday, November 17, 2010
Fisheye Noir
Labels:
free verse,
image,
poetry
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15 comments:
'Never again,' says the drunkard - until the next time. Excellent!
Oooh, someone with my same thought, seen from a different angle.
Nice.
-- K
Kay, Alberta, Canada
An Unfittie's Guide to Adventurous Travel
You describe the feeling, well.
The mood and feeling well evoked here.
Ah, the alfluence of inkohol...
Nice job with alcohol and drunkness :) Spot on!
Oh, this made my thirsty! I particularly like "The walls are stained and sweating. It's like being underwater, fish in a grimy tank
in some dentist's office."
Vivid descriptions ... too much booze definitely not cool. Nicely written.
nice! i ran with the bottle myself.
time for a little hair of the dog!...and if your dentist can't keep his tank clean, what kind of job is he doin' on your teeth? :)
I like the tone in this. I saw the bottle at first as well.
This is full of life,
love the way you make your hit on the prompt.
well done.
keep it up.
I am your follower, welcome follow us back.
hope to see you at our week 11 potluck tonight.
we are open Sunday, American central time 8pm and remain open until Wednesday 8am.
any poems are welcome,
linking in early would be of most beneficial to have your work read and commented by fellow participants.
love your blog,
your talent is evidently demonstrated here.
keep sharing.
Smiles.
magnificent magpie.
Phhheewww.. I am sweating reading this one!! Fantastic imagery!! And powerful words too!!
And that bit about the dentist's tank -- WOW!!! Point noted! And now, I am just doubly nervous.. :)
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