Welcome to Dorian's

For years there was a beauty parlor here in Portland called Dorian Grey's. It may still be there; I haven't had the nerve to go look.

Welcome to Dorian's, ma'am, it's a pleasure.
Our wares are on display... please, at your leisure...
One understands, the importance of impressions
and above all else, you may trust our discretion.

We begin with a full-length photograph, you see
which goes on file... well, permanently.
It captures you at a moment of complete perfection.
No, I'm afraid we can't allow inspections.

But you will be satisfied, please rest assured.
Our customers... preserve their youthful allure.
As years go on, your acquaintances will stare
and whisper about the naturalness of your hair.

Envious talk, oh yes, Dorian's has heard it all.
Expect their tongues to wag... my dear, it's a small
price to pay, for the glamor of unchanging youth!
You'll live a beautiful lie while the photo shows the ugly truth.