If I dared to burn I wouldn't be a candle.
A forest full of living flame,
a sun holding planets in close embrace—
distant races would feel my glow and populate their skies
with monsters and heroes.
If I dared to weep I wouldn't be a raindrop.
I'd be typhoon-thrashed oceans of salt,
I'd be the Milky Way falling endlessly over dark-matter cliffs
only to be swallowed by hungry black holes
at the heart of the universe.
Dare to be stone. No pebble to be kicked
but a frowning mountain, aerie of eagles. Dare
to be the Perseids, streaking the nights of August
with burning dust. Dare to be Mercury in the arms
of Sol; Pluto in the arms of darkness.
If I dared to be dust I would be the birthplace of stars.
If I dared to love, Beloved
what could we be?
--for Big Tent's "dare" prompt.
Collection available! Knocking from Inside
Thursday, June 03, 2010
Daring Heaven
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16 comments:
This is wonderful.
What could we be indeed? Everything that led to that question, led to that question. There is an almost natural progression to this piece. I love it!
That's the stuff. Think big!
ViV
I like the structure and energy of this poem. Very nice!
Aim high and anything's possible.
Just lovely. So many things one can aim for if one things large rathet than small.
http://inthecornerofmyeye.blogspot.com/2010/06/tauranga-jet-boat-ride.html
tiel -- this is my favorite tiel poem, i think! the magnitude of everything you mention here is so aptly written. i love it from its beginning (a sun holding planets in close embrace) to its end (that lovely last stanza)!
The parallel structure of each stanza works so well. The images are strong and vivid and the writing is beautiful,
Linda Frances
Brilliant! Seriously!
Wonderfully visual and strong! Daring, indeed.
Wow. I had to stop at "If I dared to weep I wouldn't be a raindrop./I'd be typhoon-thrashed oceans of salt," and catch my breath. But, you made me braver in the next stanza, as I became a mountain in your dare. But, oh, who could match you in your love? You've set very high standards, at least poetically, Tiel. Memorable.
http://lindagoin.com/
Beautiful, yes, and my favorite:
"If I dared to be dust I would be the birthplace of stars." Love how the humble can give place to ethereal.
I love it
As usual, Tiel, I am in awe of your writing. You carried me far in this poem and I certainly wanted to travel on these paths.
That's a fearful love to contemplate
Fantastic poem! I love this.
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