I think I'm on the downhill side of noon,
I think the hazy sun is sinking low.
I think I hear a falling fading tune
that calls out from the dark side of the moon,
that tells each falling star it's time to go.
I think I'm on the downhill side of noon
where shadows claim the east side of each dune
and tides are on the ebb, not on the flow.
I think I hear a falling fading tune
that echoes through the waning afternoon
and makes the clocks tick loud and extra slow
because I'm on the downhill side of noon
adrift, a note that's tied to a balloon
a coded cryptic message meant to show
the meaning of this falling fading tune.
The message will come clear in time, and soon
both you and I will decode it and know
the secrets of the downhill side of noon
the meaning of this falling fading tune.
If you like poetry, check out the weekly prompt site at Totally Optional Prompts
Tuesday, November 06, 2007
Downhill Side
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11 comments:
I like the end of line rhymes and the way the poem ends like a little song!
T - I always stand in awe of this form of poetry. Your post here is wonderful. Great sense of time in this piece.
D
oh, beautifully done!
vwd 3tu
You use form so beautifully. I enjoy the sense of sliding into end of day (and more) found here.
And I am intrigued by Alan's response to "a coded cryptic message meant to show" ??
Help :-) please.
Very lyrical and lovely!
The form works particularly well with this enchanting words. Beautiful poetry, just beautiful! And, yes, evocative...
This is like music and just rolls off the tongue so beautifully...
Perfect lines for repetition! I love villanelles and this one is lyrical and thought-provoking! ~Linda
I really loved this poem :) Cryptic and almost melancholy, but smooth and clear also. Being on the downhill side of noon myself, I can relate to the falling fading tune :)
Ya Haqq!
Very nice,
The moon, noon and time references make it work well as a villanelle.
Rick Mullin
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